Dear Bunmi,
I met my current girlfriend three years ago after she’d been let down by her ex-husband.
She said he told her their marriage was a mistake and he just took
off. For two years she didn’t even know where he was. Now he’s shown up
again. Since then, she’d been distant and less keen on our relationship.
A few nights ago, she went out and came home at 3 am. She told me she was with friends but I’m sure she was with him. Does our relationship stand a chance? I’m really upset by this development.
Michael By e-mail.
Dear Michael,
It is often very difficult to get over your first love and right now, your girlfriend is confused. Her behaviour might look suspicious but you need to trust her. Give her space but let her know you’re willing to listen whenever she feels like talking. If she keeps on giving you the cold shoulder, try initiating the talk and let her know you understand why she’s confused.
Just bear in mind that no matter how much you hate this man, you should try to avoid being too critical or angry with him, or your girlfriend won’t feel she can open up to you. The man broke her heart once and left her in the lurch. Trusting that kind of man again takes a lot of courage. Be patient and with time, your girl might get over her confusion.
I met my current girlfriend three years ago after she’d been let down by her ex-husband.
love
A few nights ago, she went out and came home at 3 am. She told me she was with friends but I’m sure she was with him. Does our relationship stand a chance? I’m really upset by this development.
Michael By e-mail.
Dear Michael,
It is often very difficult to get over your first love and right now, your girlfriend is confused. Her behaviour might look suspicious but you need to trust her. Give her space but let her know you’re willing to listen whenever she feels like talking. If she keeps on giving you the cold shoulder, try initiating the talk and let her know you understand why she’s confused.
Just bear in mind that no matter how much you hate this man, you should try to avoid being too critical or angry with him, or your girlfriend won’t feel she can open up to you. The man broke her heart once and left her in the lurch. Trusting that kind of man again takes a lot of courage. Be patient and with time, your girl might get over her confusion.
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